To quell the questions and the inquisitive minds (notice I didn’t call you ‘nosy’!), I thought I best to clue you in as to what’s up, just in case you heaven forbid!) thought I’d dropped off the face of Mother Earth. No such luck in that arena yet!
Instead, I have been on the treadmill of what I am learning to call “LIVING” albeit with the after and current effects of the privilege of cancer, DES exposure, being hit by a drunk driver, a brain bleed and the best I save for last: getting OLD!!
No complaints, seriously! It has just been a barrage of 3-6+ months of doctor appointments, x-ray this, let’s see about that, surgically remove this, throw in a virus or two, plus the discovery of not just chemo-related glaucoma, but chemo-related cataracts and chemo-related osteoporosis that will necessitate burning the nerves, so not to feel the pain at L1-L5/S1 after the eyes are done, as well. I have finally decided that if you are good at something, you might as well perfect the art of dealing with it! (No, that doesn’t mean sitting around doing “nothing but sleeping!)
The loss of vision (to be surgically corrected in late July and August) has been the hardest. It has impacted my writing and normal mode of communication. Well, I take that back – it’s not been the hardest. That would go to not being able to see my grandson as often, except via Face Time or photos being hardest!!
Why do I share this? Mostly to share and help others see what you may not think about, or may figure a person just “doesn’t want to be in touch”. O Contraire! For people who deal with chronic conditions or even multiple situations, times like the last few months since you’ve heard me blog, can be really frustrating – even over-whelming!
Here are some hints that have been helpful and appreciated:
Drop a card or funny card – hearing via snail-mail, and a good laugh are sometimes just what we need!
Text a saying/sentiment/verse that has been special for you – and text them why.
Drop a meal or dessert by – and be mindful of their dietary restrictions. AND (not ME!!) if they refuse, drop by with some other little “something”!
Call and check in! If they are napping, they will most likely turn their cell off and you can leave a message or they will take the land line off and it will ring, and ring, and ring, and ring!
Don’t forget the spouses or kids. Dollar bins at stores are perfect places to pick up “little items”!
Cut us some slack/grace. We can be grumpy, grouchy, gritchy, and unintentionally even seemingly rude (don’t take offense!) LIVING is hard work on a “good” day!
Remember that many of your friends, as they “mature” can’t do what they used to – an offer to vacuum or help pull some weeds will elevate you to super-stardom in a flash!
So, yes, for those of you who are nosy, I am doing fine. Sort of. I don’t do “don’t do” well! My son and I are working on the edit of Book 2, hoping to get it off to Amazon by fall. Book 3 is in writing form, so all is not for naught! I may move slower, fall a bit more, get gritchy easier, but like Johnny 5: I’M ALIVE!
And thanks for texting, calling, snail-mailing, meals, and yes, vacuuming!!
Care Tuk is a nationally known speaker, educator, and retreat/workshop leader. She has been a school, hospital, and home health occupational therapist for more than 30 years. She has been named as a Top Business Woman in America and recognized for her work with youth, disability outreach and awareness, and the American Cancer Society.